A girlfriend and I were just talking about our dating experiences when I started reminiscing upon the old fairytale.
How many frogs must a girl kiss to find Prince Charming? All of us girls were raised thinking if we believed in the frog, that poor little underappreciated mistreated frog who wanted so much to be with us, and we kissed him-he would turn into the man of our dreams, Prince Charming.
What no one told us was that there are many frogs out there. Many frogs masquerading as Princes but at the end of the day, they are just a plain old frogs. These frogs are charming, they will lie, manipulate and play on our dreams to get us but they are not ever going to turn into a prince.
This is what I like to call the Prince Charming Syndrome. These are the guys who tell you everything you want to hear, they seem so sweet and into you, they do all sort of things for you- but they are really just a frog in Prince's clothing.
I have known many a frog. They tell you that you are the most gorgeous woman they have ever seen. Or how you are so alike or so insync and how you make them feel so amazing. They will pick you up from appointments, go out of their way to make you a priority, send you sweet emails professing their emotions, pictures and generally inundate you with everything you dreamt of until you fall for them. And they can keep up the facade for awhile. As long as their is something in it for them.
I once fell for a frog like this. He was so sweet and amazing, I couldn't help but like him. I was his playboy dream girl, the most gorgeous girl he had ever seen, he wanted me so much, adored me, couldn't stand to be apart from me, called me his princess, picked me up from everywhere I had to go, took me home to his parents and showed every sign of being a prince. He brought me flowers all the time, cards, made me dinner every night and snuggled with me endlessly. He even told me he loved me first.
Girls Girls- this is what we want to hear - that love, that charm, all those sweet words and deeds. But really its just what you want to hear, its not real. "Your so wonderful, I adore you, we are so insync....these things get told so quickly. Think about it - when someone tells you this stuff a month, two or even 3 into a relationship do they really know how wonderful you are? Have you really spent enough time together to know if your really connected? No! Sometimes these frogs say this stuff within hours or days of meeting you. Beware the frog that does this- its not real.
If they think you want a normal, stable, loyal guy - they will be that. If they think you want a party boy and fun- they will be that. If they think you want an ambitious, career driven guy with a successful future they will make it seem like they are that as well. They will morph themselves into whatever person they think you want so they can get what they want....
However, once you start calling them on their bs and expecting them to show you the goods they will start to show you their frogginess. For example, if you think a frog is making money or has great career potential they will borrow and steal from others to buy you stuff to keep up that lie. They will tell you great GREAT business ideas and concepts, even help you with ideas for your career and take some classes to show their ambition but they NEVER follow through. They can't, they are only a frog who is faking to be the prince you want.
Personally, I found out everything one of my frogs had told me was a lie - he really didn't like being affectionate, he really preferred not to talk about his feelings, he had cheated on every girlfriend he ever had and had slept with ALL of their roommates, he had lived with numerous girls before me, he had no real job or money but borrowed from his parents to keep up the charade and he didn't even like cats which he pretended to at one time. I literally found this all out in 1 day after a couple of years of this lie being kept up. And boy am I glad I found out then not another 2 years later!!!
Every girl deserves to be treated like a princess. And there are real Princes out there. As a single girl its important to look beneath the surface before jumping into anything. I have been on a number of dates lately and its hillarious what these frogs do. I have had guys tell me they are single (when they are married), that they have jobs (when they really don't), that they have burgeoning careers and businesses being built - all lies. Whatever it is they think I want - thats what they tell me. So I stopped telling them what I want and just started listening. And when you really listen - you see who someone really is. Don't be charmed by people telling you stuff too soon. For they will leave just as soon as they came.
A frog isn't even worth the effort to kiss since he won't ever turn into a prince. Nowadays when I catch a lie it indicates a frog (even tho these frogs come on so strong its tempting to believe) - I just cut them loose. My favorite saying is delete my number. Its not because I'm mad or bitter. I actually don't care at all - I just don't want to have this frog around and I want him to know there is no chance of trying to jump back in so just jump on to the next girl. I prefer to wait for the real deal and I'm quite sure that when I'm ready, I will find a real prince.
